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<title>8 by things-we-used-tc-share (Heavydirtys0ul)</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26210695">8</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heavydirtys0ul/pseuds/things-we-used-tc-share'>things-we-used-tc-share (Heavydirtys0ul)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>the billie eilish tapes [17]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, logan/patton is basically mentioned</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 08:40:15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>905</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26210695</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heavydirtys0ul/pseuds/things-we-used-tc-share</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus is terrified Logan doesn't love him anymore and has to fight the instinct to run away from the best thing that ever happened to him before he's managed to talk to his boyfriend.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>the billie eilish tapes [17]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1281875</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Remus sits on the couch in any way a couch is not supposed to be sat on, his back on the seat and his feet up against the back, watching the world upside down as he thinks. Logan had gone out for the day with Patton, again, he doesn’t really know if something is going on between them at all, but they’ve been spending a lot of time together lately. He tries to shake the jealousy or the fear that he’s being lied too, but he doesn’t know how to shake this burning desire to know whether or not Logan loves him at all. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because it’s okay if he doesn’t, people fall out of love all the time it’s human nature to do so, but Remus needs the truth which is something he’d never thought he’d have to doubt with Logan. They both value the truth with high regards. It’s this that makes him think that perhaps he’s just being paranoid at the end of the day, Logan has never previously given him a reason to doubt that anything that comes out of his mouth is less than honest. That anything he says would remotely be a falsehood. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another part of Remus is telling him to run as he always does when faced with complex feelings, to just leave without a word and never comes back. But that would require throwing away the best thing that’s ever happened to him without knowing if it’s warranted at all. He sighs to himself and drags his hands down his face, looking exhausted; this much thinking really is not good for his health, self-esteem and general wellbeing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The front door creaks open and Logan wanders in, looking rather tired but otherwise happy. Remus tries to remember if he makes Logan happy, or tired anymore, or if any energy goes into their relationship at all. He swings his feet down and slides off the couch, Logan goes to say hello to him but freezes. “Are you...quite all right, Remus?” he isn’t all right, but he hadn’t meant for his expression to mirror that at all. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I…” He clears his throat “...should I...go, Logan?” He asks softly, his hands shaking “...do I still make you happy?” Logan’s eyebrows furrow as he places his shopping bags down on the floor and approaches Remus, his entire expression is floating somewhere between shock and genuine worry. The younger relaxes at this expression and when Logan’s hands rest on his forearms he finds himself sinking into the touch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You make me happy, Remus, truly, I don’t understand what has happened but I sincerely apologise if I have lead you to believe you don’t mean the world to me.” Remus nods, his eyes fluttering closed. “I know I must not be an easy person to please sometimes, I’m not exactly expressive, but I love you so much and no, I certainly do not want you to go.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The brunet smiles and rests his forehead on Logan’s chest, hugging him close as he finds a sense of relief in the words. “You’ve been a bit distant Lo,” he admits “It’s not your fault, you should be allowed to go out and see your friends and it wouldn’t be fair for me to tell you to do anything else, and I don’t want to ask you to do that it’s just...I’ve been a bit lonely, because it’s like you always have plans with Patton.” He takes a deep breath and pulls away from Logan a little. “Look I just want honesty, I know you love me...but do you love him too?” Logan’s eyebrows furrow and he opens his mouth o speak and then closes it again, seemingly deep in thought. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Patton is my friend.” He says finally “Am I not supposed to love him?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course you are,” Remus snorts “but do you love him the same as me or differently?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Logan looks stumped, scratching the back of his head “You can fall in love with more than one person?” Remus wants to laugh and cry at the same time. At least he knows Logan wasn’t cheating on him at all, no the poor fool is far too emotionally inept to put two and two together. “Well, I...I enjoy his company, I’m excited to see him as I am with you, I miss you when I’m with him, and I miss him when I’m with you, I would say the love is not all that different.” His eyebrows furrow again “Is that cheating? Am I cheating on you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No you moron, you’re just polyamorous,” He shakes his head. “It’s okay, actually I’m a little relieved that’s the case and not that you just didn’t love me anymore.” Logan looks shocked again then like he couldn’t fathom ever being without Remus, it makes the other’s heart feel erratic just staring at the expression. “You should talk to him about it,” he leans up to press a gentle kiss to Logan’s lips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s glad this was the outcome. He’d been so sure for a moment he was going to do a runner, but mostly it comes down to his own insecurities, something that he will be working on for the rest of his life and Logan’s own issues with identifying emotions. Remus is just relieved because he really didn’t want to have to let go of Logan, he doesn’t think he’ll ever want that. </span>
</p>
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